Looking Out My Back Window #177

Originally posted on Facebook HERE

I’m finding myself a little bit more “down” than usual lately. Nothing major, not anything abnormal at all – I gotta believe we all have periods, or days, or moments when we’re just – maybe sad for no apparent reason. Just “down”. I devoted a chapter of my book “Feed Your Angel” to this subject. I plan to revisit that once I’m done here today. I think when it happens to me, there’s usually one or two underlying reasons. The first is overload. Just thinking I can get everything I want to do done quickly and efficiently always, which probably isn’t the case for anyone, including me. So, some things get pushed back, sometimes whatever you’re working on doesn’t always go as planned, maybe takes longer, or worse yet – becomes totally impossible. And I have a tendency to cut myself zero slack. In everything. I’ll remember something I said ten years ago to a person I can’t even name today because they weren’t anyone I ever knew in the first place, but feel guilt and embarrassment – why did I say that? What was I thinking? I am such an asshole. So, when you have an unrealistic view of what you can accomplish in a short period of time, and some things don’t get done – well, who’s to blame for that? Yourself, of course. I’ve found over the years the importance of taking breaks to combat this, but – this year? No breaks, no vacations, no travel. I was lucky to get a vacation to Mexico in with my old band just as the pandemic broke in the US. Overload, combined with a perfectionist mindset can lead to down feelings – incompetence. Not being able to let go of any perceived mistakes – even those made years ago. I’ve known this about myself for a long time, and the importance of stepping back to get a clear perspective. In general, I’m pretty good at keeping myself healthy and in good spirits. Nobody is ever one hundred percent, though, including me. When it does happen it’s a good time to reflect on what’s going on in your life. And the answer often boils down to one thing – simplify. You can’t be all things to all people all the time. You have to know what’s truly important to yourself, not what you “think” should be important based on everyone else’s lives and views, but what is important in your own heart. My book “Everybody Dies” is basically totally on this subject. Then start cutting out the things that matter the least to you. It’s like in music – often when the groove isn’t just right – you take notes out. It’s all about the space between the notes. All notes, no space is just gibberish – it would make you crazy to listen to that for any length of time. As it is in life. Life needs space. Space for appreciation of the things we already have. Space to spend time doing the things we love. Space to forgive others and ourselves. Space to cut ourselves some slack. It’s very hard to love anyone, including yourself, without space between the notes.

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