Originally posted on Facebook HERE
Storms blew through last night, wind and rain and thunder. Not a fan. Kept me awake for a while… thinking about the week ahead. I saw a meme on Facebook this week about ADHD time processing (photo below). Basically, for those of us who are afflicted with this problem, our monkey minds look at where we’re at and start extrapolating out every moment of the week. Like – I know I have to blog right now, but then I need breakfast and hit the music room for meditation and yoga and put together the new desk and rearrange things and play music, eat lunch, run, lift weights, have dinner and watch tv… tomorrow I’m in Sheboygan, Tuesday and Wednesday work days but accountant Tuesday night and practice on Wednesday, Thursday and Friday are totally covered with activities, Saturday morning yoga class, head to work after that and mentally I’m already in next Sunday. Sheesh! It isn’t easy to be in the moment when mentally you’re always five steps ahead. I guess the same thing would hold true for people stuck in the past as well, but right now that certainly isn’t an issue for me. There’s a level of anxiety that comes from always looking forward. Everything needs to be done quickly, perfectly, and the world should align to the schedule you’ve already run through your head. But the world doesn’t do that. Appointments get cancelled, situations change, and all the time and effort put in thinking about the week ahead can be altered in an instant. Happiness isn’t really something to shoot for in the future, it can only be experienced in the present moment – and if we’re never in the present moment, how happy can we be? I swear Waupun has a fleet of retired people they hired just to drive 20 mph through town, (seemingly always in a Buick), just to teach us to slow down a bit. And we all know that feeling. Have someone cut us off to pull in front of our car and go 10 mph slower than we were going. I’d say that usually doesn’t take me to a spiritual space. But I’m getting slightly better at seeing why it could. No matter how much I plan, no matter what I want to see and control in my life – I’m not in control at all and never will be. This is why meditation, as well as ending yoga sessions with “savasana” (the corpse pose), are important to me. Balance poses as well. You can really see where your mind is at when you stop to check in with where your mind is at. Some days it flows easily, other days ten minutes of meditation seems to go on forever… monkey mind gone wild! Which is often what happens to and frustrates beginners… trying to meditate, but your mind is still doing ADHD time processing and getting anxious because, why are you just sitting there? We have things to do!… We indeed will always have things to do. We have been alive long enough to know they will all get done in time. We have very little time to work with. Why live our lives a week, month or year in advance? Now is the only moment we have. Learning to live in the now is a lifelong process.