Originally posted on Facebook HERE
As long as I can remember I’ve really never liked storms at all. So – the storms we had last night that are continuing into this morning really make me uneasy. They’re not really all that bad as storms go I guess, but I don’t like them at all. Never have. And it’s something I have to deal with several times a year, every year. Thunderstorms, tornadoes, blizzards… not my favorite things. And it got me thinking about how storms blow into all of our lives on a personal level as well. We will have unexpected events hit us that sometimes have devastating consequences. Like losing a spouse or a child in an accident. Being told your company is letting you go after years of working there and having no advance notice at all. Having your spouse ask for a divorce. Or being told your newborn child has a significant birth defect. All things I’ve seen more than once from people I know. Getting a cancer diagnosis is another. No matter how much we try to avoid the storms – storms are going to roll in anyway. And just like when that thunderstorm starts rolling in – inside, our emotions start to go crazy. It’s panic and fear and sadness and anger and despair and anxiety and several others I probably haven’t mentioned all rolled into one. Now what? Now what do I do? I just lost my spouse, or my child, or my job… or just diagnosed with cancer, or had a child that will need care their entire life… or any number of things… it feels like nothing is real. It’s that super uneasy state of limbo, right? Where do I go from here? Will I let that panic take over? Certainly some people do. The anger just takes over. Or the sadness. It’s probably hard not to. I’ve told the story before, but as an example – my father lost his first wife, his mother, his father… and – in horrible fashion – his 14 year old son, who was hit by lightening and killed on a golf course – all within six months. How’s that for a storm, eh? I really wish he was alive so I could ask him how he ever managed to cope with all that. That’s the kind of thing that can suck the life out of you and make you really check out. But he met my mom, got married and they had me – which was a huge deal for my father. To have another son. And I know – I guess I always knew – he really appreciated having a second chance. I don’t think he ever saw it coming, either – as I’m pretty sure they thought they couldn’t even have kids (mom was 44, dad was 48 when I was born). I think because of the loss of his son, he appreciated having a son more than someone who had never gone through that. I never doubted his love for me, I can tell you that. It was obvious. When I hit bottom with drugs and alcohol – no car, no home, in debt, hated myself really… I wasn’t even sure I wanted to live at all. This is what the storms we face can do to you. But… and usually this takes time… we need time to heal. Years later, so many of the “worst” events of my life were things that propelled me forward and/or gave me a greater appreciation of what a gift it is just to be alive. I know what a gift it I to just wake up sober more than someone who hasn’t been through alcohol and cocaine addiction, for example. Our greatest challenges carry the seeds of our greatest successes in life if we just start to pay attention and look for the silver linings. There will be storms. We will wonder why – why is this happening to me?… Our lives will take a turn we weren’t expecting… and it’s up to us to decide what we do when it happens. Hard to see the light when all around you it’s only darkness… We can look for the light switch, or wallow in the darkness. The choice is ours. I don’t like storms at all, but I know if I can just hang in there it will pass eventually. And I’ll be stronger for having lived through it. Wishing you the best today, hoping there are no storms you’re dealing with right now, but if there is – remember, there is always light somewhere. May you find it and let love be your guide today and always.
