Originally posted on Facebook HERE
Everything begins and ends with what we perceive it to be. And no two people will ever see things the same. One man’s heaven is another’s hell. All the upset in our lives, all the hatred and anger we’ve ever felt, begins and ends with our own thoughts and beliefs. I know people who live angry – it always seems like there’s something pissing them off. They seldom seem happy at all. And I have some friends that just exude happiness and love, no matter what’s going on in their lives. What is rich? What is healthy? What is love? No two people see any of this exactly the same. Yet we seem obsessed with getting people to see things our way. Why? Why does it matter if someone else doesn’t see things the way you do? It doesn’t unless we believe it does. We all have things we feel very strongly about. Some people seem to like arguing about politics, or money, or what the best diet plan is, or the correct way to run a relationship… or anything else, for that matter. I’m much more apt to “agree to disagree” now than ever before in my life. Because I don’t need you to think the way I do. You will never think the way I do. I will never see things the way you do – and isn’t that part of what makes life interesting? You never know what’s next. Ever. You can plan all you want, and life will throw you unexpected curveballs along the way. Some will be awful – losing a pet or a loved one, fires, hurricanes, tornados, etc – and some will be amazing. Along the way our happiness is determined by how we see our present moments. If you love to argue, if that’s something that brings you joy – then argue! Find others who love it the way you do and go crazy. That won’t be me. So, we tend to find groups of people who mostly resonate with us. Our tribes, I guess. And we have many tribes in our lives, too – family, work, recreation, etc… and sometimes we find new tribes along the way, too. Get interested in something new, like genealogy or trains or playing guitar… and you’ll start to find a whole new group of people with that similar interest to connect with. The main thing is to realize how important every moment is. How fragile life is. See the wonder and beauty in every moment. So easy to say, so hard to do, because we take things for granted. I try to catch myself when I feel like I’m taking something or someone for granted and make it a point to be more aware, or let that person know how much they mean to me. And, there will be times when you will perceive yourself as unworthy, too. This is a huge issue for me, and maybe many others as well, especially addicts I guess. The striving to be perfect. Looking back with waste colored glasses and seeing every stupid thing you’ve ever done or said and obsessing over it. Every bad experience carries with it the seed of an equal or greater positive experience if you look for it. Too many of us choose to wallow in it instead. How are you feeling right now, in this moment? Happy? Sad? Anxious? As humans, we do have some control over what we do and see and feel. For the 15 years I was addicted to drugs and alcohol, I really had times where I wallowed in my ineptitude. Since then, every day I try to move towards being a better person. A more loving and honest person. A happier person. And that’s really all we can do, right? It’s not like I quit drinking and I flipped a switch and became a happy, well-adjusted human. It’s a process. A daily, minute to minute, second to second process. And all we can ever control is now… and it’s gone… now… and it’s gone… now… “be here now” – Ram Dass. I’m doing the best I can. I wish you success on your journey, wherever it takes you…
