Looking Out My Back Window #261

Originally posted on Facebook HERE

With my life in utter turmoil right now, brought on by my recent job change and starting my own business – my own doing – I took a look back on the other times in my life that everything started feeling a bit out of control. Because I’ve lived long enough now to have been through several periods of turmoil. The first thing that came to mind was when I was 22 and got the call that my father had passed away. Just like that. Not at all expected. I was right in the middle of my alcohol and drug addiction. And I was young enough that I guess I though he’d live forever. Then, one day, just like that – he was gone. And it rocked my world hard. I loved him so much. Sometimes our lives are turned upside down by circumstances out of our control. You never really get over the first major loss like this. I probably didn’t handle it very well, either. I wasn’t at a point in my life where I could. I had some serious issues of my own that needed dealing with. The second reallly large “period of turmoil” I remember was in 1988, at age 28, getting a drunk driving charge, losing my license, and changing relationships all at the same time. Really felt like everything was out of control and in limbo. But this time, that period – hitting bottom – was one of the best things that ever happened to me. You can’t really know how blessed you are to wake up sober every day unless you’ve truly lived life the other way. And I had lived the other way for many years at that point. Our deepest, darkest hours can frame our greatest achievements if we learn to see them in the right perspective. This period was a huge defining period of time that framed the rest of my life for the better. The next period of turmoil was my last job change. In 2006, at the age of 46, I decided to leave real estate and music behind to become a financial advisor. Oh, man – scary as hell. I loved being a Realtor. And there was no way I could see being able to play in bands at that time and start up a new career in finance. But my life really seemed guided in that direction. Being guided is one thing – actually taking the leap is another. Stepping off the ledge into the unknown, well, as I talked about last week – you have to have faith. That first year was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done in my life. A lot of inner turmoil, self doubt and anxiety – I questioned that decision many times over in the early days. But I let myself be guided by my internal faith that this was the path I needed to be on – and, wow. Did that ever pay off in the end. One of the best decisions in ever made. But sometimes when we follow our hearts – basically any time we do, I guess – it’s not always easy to do so. Especially at first. Some people will wonder what you’re thinking, why would you do this, and fill your head with all the negatives. People aren’t the best guides, though. For me, I try to let God’s wisdom guide my choices. The last two times I did that have really worked out extremely well for me, although both times it was a scary and anxious beginning. Turmoil comes to us in many ways. We have the choice to frame it however we want to. In my life, the greatest periods of turmoil have led to the greatest growth. I have faith that as tough as it seems right now, I’ll look back and say, “wow, I can’t believe I did that but what a great decision” someday. Because it was and is guided by faith. And when faith is your guide, you always make the right decisions 🙂

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