Looking Out My Back Window #342

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Originally posted on Facebook HERE

Love the fog today. It’s a great day here. I’ve been feeling it all day. It’s my wife’s birthday today. She is 69 years old now. That’s just crazy to me. I’ll be 65 myself later this year – qualifying for Medicare. Insane. I don’t see her in any way as being 69 years old. I don’t in any way see myself as 64 years old, either. And tomorrow, Gizmo turns 7 as well – maybe halfway through his life. Time… it blows by. When I was young, I loved birthdays. There were several that were really special – at 16, able to drive – at 18, able to drink (back in my day), etc… and there were presents, and it was always a good reason to get wasted I guess. Wow. When I think back to what I did to myself when I was younger, I’m just happy to be alive at all. I don’t think I had a proper respect for life itself back then. I was just looking to find a way to get drunk or high… from ages 14-29 that was probably my #1 daily mission most days. And I’d take whatever I could find. And mix it with whatever else became available. I wasn’t very in touch with love back then. I wasn’t a very lovable person. Inside – I didn’t really like who I was, but it didn’t seem like I was in charge because I let my obsession with getting high run my moments. And I let it take me so far down there were many days I wasn’t sure I even wanted to live. That’s a tough thing to admit to. But that’s what can happen when you have no respect for the moments you’re given. You throw them away in pursuit of meaningless activities. I threw many moments away like that. But here’s the odd thing about it – if you can realize what you’re doing, you can start living your life in a different way. The moment you make the decision “I’m not going to live like that anymore” – no matter what it is – is the moment everything can shift for the better. And when you start moving in the direction of dreams worth having, you’ll be better off for having worked through the tough times. It will give you a newfound respect for every moment you get, because we really have so few. So, we start to live from there. Do you love yourself? Take a long, hard look at that – because we can all say “yes, I love myself” – then see where we’re not eating properly, excercising, getting enough sleep, or doing anything to keep our minds and our attitudes sharp and positive. You show yourself love by taking care of yourself first. And in time, we learn to radiate love. Nobody is ever perfect with that, but if that’s our goal, we get better at it with age. We’re more grateful for the moments we have. Everyone you know will die. Every pet you have will die. You will die. You can’t really determine how or when you’ll pass, but you can determine how you’ll use this knowledge to live. Respect the moments you’re given – please. Do the best you can, always. Help others whenever you can. Don’t be an asshole, even when it might seem appropriate. There’s plenty of that type of behavior in the world already. My wife is the youngest 69 year old I know. I love her for that, and for often pulling me back into reality when I let my new obsessions (mostly work) get in the way of properly taking care of myself. Respect every moment. We only get one shot at this.