Originally posted on Facebook HERE
We had a great Christmas this year, I hope you did as well if it’s a holiday you celebrate. It’s a time of year that can bring people great joy and also great sadness, loneliness and/or desolation as well depending on your personal circumstances. In my line of work, I am often dealing with people who have lost a loved one, or are in the middle of breaking up a relationship. We see death and divorce a lot. Every month I’m working with someone who’s lost somebody close to them, or who has to make a tough decision regarding care for someone close to them, or is in the middle of ending a relationship, often one that they’ve had for years. Which means there are always people at this time of year who are dealing with loss in some form. Friday I found out that my sister passed away quietly in her home. She would have been 82 on Monday had she made it. My two sisters are from my parents previous marriages. They were both around 19-20 years old when I was born. My parents first spouses passed away, they got married later in life and had me as the only child from that marriage. When I was a kid I was pretty close to my sister Sandy (who recently passed) and her husband John, who certainly was an early male role model for me. Just a fantastic human being. He passed years ago, and Sandy and I were the only two kids remaining from the Geschke bloodline. They used to come up for weekly visits, I’d go stay with them for a week every summer, we’d play board games and do fun excursions. But life moves on, right? Our father passed away in 1981. My sister had two kids of her own. John passed in 1990. And we just never really kept in very close contact much after dad passed away. Not sure why that was, but we didn’t. We’d talk every now and then, get together here and there, it was always a great time, and we’d say how we should really do it more often… then we didn’t. You think you have time, you know? Until you don’t. And now we don’t. And when someone close to you passes, you can start to think about all the “what if’s” and “I should have’s” and “I wish I had’s”… and there’s nothing you can do about it. Is there anyone in your life you’ve been putting off seeing or calling because, well – we’re all busy, right? Is there a friend or family member who maybe doesn’t realize how much they mean to you, and you’ve always been thinking you should let them know, but – the time never seems right, or it’s a tough conversation to have for you, and, you know – there’s always time for that later, right? Now is the only time we have. Right now. Nothing lasts forever. Nothing is guaranteed. Loss happens to all of us, often at the most inopportune times. Not that there’s ever a good time, but every year we probably all know someone who is dealing with a significant tragedy during the holidays. And the fact that the person they lost won’t be here this year, or that relationship is now over, or that job no longer exists… or whatever hit they’ve taken was taken during the holidays… can compound the anguish. I wrote about the holiday season being above love last week. Reaching out to the people who need it at this time, and touching base with family and friends to let them know how much they mean to you are great ways to honor the loving spirit of the holiday season.